April 21, 2006
Great Shoes!
I think I underestimated a mother’s encouragement until I started watching American Idol. Only a mother could tell some of those contestants they can sing! Actually, I too am guilty of giving undeserved praise. I think it’s a hold over from being taught ‘If you can’t say something good about someone, don’t say anything’. I especially struggle with what to say to an experienced preacher or teacher who presents a less than adequate message.
You know the type of presentation where the speaker tries to wing it, or deliver a personal agenda message, or they pull a re-run lesson out of the file when they don’t want to prepare a new lesson. When I shake hands with a speaker I want to compliment them on their message and say, “Good job!” But when it wasn’t a good job, what do you say, “I like your shoes…”?
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Gail,
It is interesting that I find you addressing this topic today. I was just thinking about the propriety and impropriety of criticism last night and this morning.
We live in a world of criticism. The government and its laws are criticized, the citizens are criticized by the government and its laws. Companies, institutions, moms and dads, brothers and sisters, friends and children, everything gets criticized almost continually. And then there are those who criticize the criticizing as if they are not participating in criticism! I would go mad if there were not a couple simple answers that I have found to the question, "To criticize, or not to criticize."
1) The truth. Does the Word of God itself expose the shortcoming? If I have to put a few passages of the Bible through one or more gymnastic steps for a principle to become clear, I will do so, and I will hold myself to that principle. But I will not hold anyone else to it. Nor will I criticize others over it. It is for me alone. But where the Bible is clear with the aid of neither gymnastics nor special lighting, the principle is for all of us. And I believe the Lord expects us to share godly criticism where the Word is clear by itself, if...
2) Principle of materiality. This is a concept that surfaces in many areas of the accounting world. It recognizes that reality is not a homogenously smooth whole without flaw or contradiction. In fact, it recognizes the absolute truth of flaw and contradiction and the fact that give here means take there. To everyuthing there is a price. One price of criticism is possible hurt feelings and strain on relationship. You can probably think of many more. But non-criticism also has its price, like the embarassment a loved one may continue to accumulate by an
unwitting repetition of error. So the principle of materiality simply addresses which price is more expensive than the other, that of criticism, or that of non-criticism. Each situation has its own economy of love, and comparing the prices will answer the question.
Just be sure to remember that errors in the pulpit can exact some heavy prices. The Bible itself intimates that truism.
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