February 20, 2013

In Lieu Of

I recently scanned an obituary that was a full half page tribute to the deceased. The 91 year-old man, an accomplished athlete, coach and teacher, had his career summed up saying that coaching was his passion, but teaching was his calling. The dates and the titles of his worldly accomplishments were all listed, but the accolades had no hint of a Spiritual foundation, other than he attended a Catholic high school. The end of the tribute reads, “In lieu of flowers, the Coach would appreciate a couple of prayers on his behalf or, if you choose, donations to either…” I just have to wonder, what type of prayers Coach would appreciate and exactly what good would come of the prayers.

3 comments:

Steve Corey said...

Gail;

-----I wonder if somebody asked the coach before he died whether he would rather have flowers or prayers at his funeral. I suppose it is more probable that he simply mentioned it to someone he trusted. I would certainly be interested in all the prayers I could get if I were hours away from departing a life in which I paid no attention to the Lord.
-----I don’t think this ambition would be too out of place, either. Paul sent greetings to Priscilla and Aquila at II Tim 4:19, but not to Onesiphorus. Earlier in the letter, he praised Onesiphorus for his loyalty, ambition, and service. Why would he then not send him greetings in the same letter, but instead, sent greetings to his household? In fact, Paul invoked God to grant mercy on Onesiphorus’ household before he praised him in careful terms of past tense. Then Paul invoked God to, “...grant him to find mercy from the Lord on that Day.” (II Tim 1:16) All of this builds a very strong sense that Onesiphorus has passed away, and Paul has pronounced a kind of prayer for him.
-----Wherever there is belief in an afterlife there seems to be prayers for the dead. It is not limited to Christianity. They are found in Judaism, Islam, Hindu, Budhism, Zoroastrianism; I don’t think it possible to believe in an afterlife and not be concerned about your departed loved ones attaining it. And I especially don’t believe it is misplaced in Christianity. Moses invoked God to change His mind a few times. I doubt there will be any bribes taken by the Judge on That Day, nor that His judgments will be swayed by any number of pleas to their contrary. But judges look at evidence, and people’s actions leave evidence as effects upon other people’s hearts and minds. Knowing God as present in this moment, the past, and the future is to know He can work His effects, too, within any of those times. What could have been considered as a humbling of self to the Lord inside a person’s heart while he lived? If there need be witnesses of such, that we, the requesters, witnessed none of it does not mean nobody witnessed any of it either. Maybe a prayer for such reality might not hurt? Or, maybe our prayers for the dead are merely expressions of such hope, placations of our own grief and anxieties more than expectations of their being granted.
-----But beyond this, at the very least, there is an attestation made to the Lord that this departed person was bound by a few chords of love, anyway, to those who do know the Lord. And in their knowledge of Him and the departed, they sense a possibility for mercy. And is the attestation of those who know the Lord considered completely worthless by the God who will also set them to judging angels? (I Cor 6:3)
----I don’t know. I don’t formally request God to grant mercy to this one and that one now departed. If I thought such requests would be granted I would ask Him to grant mercy on everyone who’s ever lived. But I do informally express all such desires and wishes to Him, maybe just because He desires that none should perish, too. (II Pet 3:9)

Love you all,
Steve Corey

Christian Ear said...

Blast it Steve…I don’t like your train of thought! Those of us who have been caregivers over an extended period of time feel a mixture of grief and relief at their passing. We did all we could do for our loved ones while they lived, but I can’t imagine leaving them on my prayer list after they have gone. I relate to David’s response at the death of his son. He fasted and pleaded with God for his son’s life, but the child died. Immediately David’s grief changed, “While the child was still alive, I fasted and wept. I thought, ‘Who knows? The LORD may be gracious to me and let the child live.’ But now that he is dead, why should I fast? Can I bring him back again? I will go to him, but he will not return to me.” (2 Samuel 12:22-23 NIV)
Gail

Steve Corey said...

Gail;
-----Something I love much about how God has made things is that one facet of reality does not necessarily negate its opposite. They merely serve different effects in different places for different needs. You and David are right for that child blessed with being known by God and for the other certainly known to be rejected by God. Many people I know died and left me in David’s exact mindset. Some others have been more troubling. One was very close to me. I try to find ways to see mercy applying to him on That Day, since he gave neither us nor the Lord the distinct sight of repenting, being baptized, and growing in the truth as he found it more. (Oh, my! All that’s kind of important.) But he said he would turn to Jesus when he found evidence establishing His reality. (I failed to suggest that he try looking.) But I knew this guy well, so I knew he wasn’t just summarily brushing off the matter. Then his life ended at twenty-four. I don’t know what further evidence he had found, or what conclusions he had drawn. I hadn’t seen him for over half a year before he died. I also know others who died in the midst of similarly troubling effects. I don’t know how much good prayer might avail them. The Bible doesn’t tell us to do it. That might be a hint. But then so was Paul’s sentiment cast for Onesiphores. Anyhow, I make no formal prayers of such kind. And I certainly don’t mean any such prayers are required. Maybe all I do is cope with the discomfort of not knowing by casting towards the Lord the thought of slim possibilities. Then again, maybe a bit more. But not much.

Steve