March 08, 2013
In God’s Sight
A fellow believer has, for financial reasons, opted to live with his female
companion rather than get married. “We’ve
decided that a piece of paper doesn’t really mean anything. In God’s sight
we’re married.” Not only was my friend trying to justify himself, but he
was also putting me on notice that the church couldn’t possibly question the
arrangement because God viewed them as married. Excuse me? I could just picture
Jesus with the Samaritan woman at the well. When Jesus asked about her husband she
was truthful and said she had no husband. Jesus responded, “You are right when you say you have no husband. The
fact is, you have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your
husband. What you have just said is quite true.” (John 4:17-18 NIV) I’m
glad the woman didn’t test the situation by saying, “Umm…but in God’s sight we’re married.”
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1 comment:
Gail;
-----I think God views many things the way we view them, especially when we are viewing from honesty. He honors man's well intended ways. But it makes people think that as long as they are married in their own hearts and minds and intentions, then they are married. And they are close to right, too. If both parties present themselves to the public as being in a marriage relationship, our law agrees; they are married. What further ceremony is needed?
-----Maybe the answer depends upon the culture in which this happens. Some cultures will relentlessly deny the informal marriage and insist upon elaborate, big-deal ceremonies. Our culture is turning loose of its traditions and ceremonies to grasp the unembellished, simple person and his intentions.
-----So what? God does not view things only according to how your friend and his "bride" view them. He views things from everyone's viewpoint. (Please don't take me to be meaning that viewing is the same as accepting.) He knows all our hearts and minds and intentions and meanings and their implications for each individual alone, as well as for those of her social group together. This is why Paul spent much ink and paper writing about consideration for your neighbor's conscience. Being important enough for God to view things from their viewpoints, too, makes your neighbors all pretty darned important. It brings one to realize how relevant consideration is to knowing God.
-----Because we do nothing which does not somehow effect the way another person thinks or feels, the "whether or not" of a marriage ceremony tests the very integriity of a couple's concept of love. Is that love to be compacted into their own little two-person world? Or, whether or not they understand why neighbors think like they do, does love also extend to what also makes neighbors comfortable with you? If not, that love's substance is not really love at all. Rather, it is a masquarading exploitation. Love does not parse down and section off. It touches everything present.
-----So, if your friend and his "bride" lived alone on a secluded island, marriage would be by their intentions in the Lord's sight, alone. The very next person who comes along will slightly modify what "marriage" means, because he's in the Lord's sight, too. And likewise when yet another comes along, and so on, ad-infinitum, until you have a cultured mindset about what makes marriage. God is watching through the eyes of that culture for how you might respond. Do you, or do you not love its people enough to please them for their edification too? Marriage extends far beyond a couple's pair of isolated hearts.
Love you all,
Steve Corey
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