August 07, 2008
No Reply
The last few days I’ve been getting emails from my cousin in Texas, but because of a glitch with my provider right now I’m unable to send a reply. Everything I send comes back as failed mail. Ken wrote, “You know if this were a conversation & not emailing, it would just be great.—Having a captive audience to talk to & they don’t get a chance to respond or take valuable time to express their thoughts or share what they know.” I hope Ken enjoys the moment, because eventually the glitch will get fixed and I will have my voice back. I sometimes treat the Lord like my own captive audience. I know He hears me, so I do all the talking. I can imagine the Spirit wanting to respond, express His thoughts and share with me…if I’d only let Him get a word in edgewise.
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Gail;
-----There was a short period in my life when I expected the Lord to directly answer my inquiries. After a number of years spent painfully waiting, it became obvious that He was not on the other end of some spiritual phone line all panting and excited to carry on a casual conversation with me. And even though Mack Phillips was blessed with a couple days of casual conversation with the Trinity at The Shack, when my brother was thrown out the windshield of his van and drug to death between two still colliding vehicles, I didn’t get any special conversational visits from my Creator. And when at eighteen, desiring to be a very good husband to a very good wife, I embarked on a seventeen year path of frightening loneliness, I found no Sophia come to show me my future bride through the window of a waterfall.
-----I still hold open the possibility that since the Lord has never come in audible or visual form to converse with me, or even come as simple pop-up thoughts in my mind like those annoying little windows on your computer, then maybe I am not His child and my redemption is all imaginary. He can have that possibility if He wants it. But I doubt He will take it, because I am the kind who, if cast into Hell, would see how long I could continue to praise Him before the overpowering disgust of that place would consume me.
-----But I will only give that possibility so much opening as it takes to remain honestly humble before Him. So then, so what if He is not on the other end of the phone line with me. So what if my physical senses have not picked up any communication from Him, nor any thought been automatically poked into my mind. He may do that for you guys, but for some reason, for me to hear Him, He has made me take my reasoning and perceptions to the things He spoke through His prophets in the past. If I am right about this situation, I think He has done this extended period of silence to me to show that I am not His captive audience, but He is mine, and my performance needs to be good and Biblical to be delightful to Him.
Love,
Steve Corey
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